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    Cipher's last thanksgiving

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    Impanther

    Posts : 250
    Join date : 2013-01-17
    Age : 26

    Cipher's last thanksgiving

    Post  Impanther on November 26th 2015, 12:08 pm

    WARNING: TEARS MAY FALL

    Two worn out suits of armor, one a standard edition set of ODST armor and the other a set of red and black Hayabusa armor, stand side by side as a middle aged man with black hair with hints of grey stares at the armor with his icy blue eyes.

    "Hey Mom," says the man quietly as tears began to fall, "we miss you, Dad is in the hospital and has not been the same since you passed earlier in the year, Melissa says that my daughter is just like you, this year we are forgoing a traditional Thanksgiving dinner to visit Dad in the hospital."

    (Two hours later at the hospital)

    "GRANDPA," shouts a ten year old girl with long brown hair and chocolate eyes, "how are you doing?"

    "I am doing fine little one," replies the old man in the hospital bed, "I will be with Grandma soon but I thank God, or whatever higher being others worship for allowing me to have a great family, I thank God for guiding me to Alaina, I thank my family for being supportive after she died, and I thank my grandchildren for wanting to learn more about Grandma Alaina and Grandpa Cipher, about how we met, how we fell in love, and about how we lived."

    Three hours later Cipher took his last breath. Three days later the funeral was held with Zachary Blade Stryker making his speech.

    "Well Dad," announces Zachary as tears roll down his face, "we miss you and Mom, She always said you would out-live her, but I know that you two are trying every supply closet heaven has to offer, all humor aside, Mom was physically eighty and you were physically eighty-one, but with all the time we spent in cryo I lost track of how old any of us really are so I will just say this, you lived to a ripe old age despite being born in a world full of conflict, you found love in a time of hardship, and you raised a family during it too, may the world never forget you"

    Note: Zachary's daughter is symbollic as she is named after Alaina, her paternal Grandmother and thus why she gets a speaking line. Cipher wasn't the same after Alaina's death in the fact that he shut himselff off from anyone that was not family. Yes, I am also aware that the writing is shitty. I blame me not feeling well for that. By the way, this is the true ending of the Apocalypse series which I have decided will completely redo the whole Raptor Squad story.
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    Impanther

    Posts : 250
    Join date : 2013-01-17
    Age : 26

    Re: Cipher's last thanksgiving

    Post  Impanther on December 1st 2015, 7:49 am

    Did I make anyone cry?
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    Shad0wChas3r
    Database Director

    Posts : 1225
    Join date : 2013-01-16
    Age : 23

    Re: Cipher's last thanksgiving

    Post  Shad0wChas3r on December 1st 2015, 1:42 pm

    It was pretty touching, yes.


    _________________


    \\'Boyo\\'

    Thanks for Reading!

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    Manny
    Freelancer Operative

    Posts : 1365
    Join date : 2013-01-17
    Age : 23
    Location : The Great White North (Canada)

    Re: Cipher's last thanksgiving

    Post  Manny on December 3rd 2015, 7:25 pm

    Writing is a lot better, especially the details like punctuation and grammar.

    I won't say a teared up, because I didn't, but it was warming to see Cipher surrounded by family.

    Hopefully, when you work on their stories, you can flesh them out a bit more and perhaps we can feel more strongly for the characters.

    Not bad though.
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    Impanther

    Posts : 250
    Join date : 2013-01-17
    Age : 26

    Re: Cipher's last thanksgiving

    Post  Impanther on December 8th 2015, 7:41 am

    Thank you Manny, this short story literally implies that most (cryo still exists) if not all first gen characters are gone. It also implies that quite a few of the second gen characters are gone too.

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    Re: Cipher's last thanksgiving

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